SPIRITUAL LEADERSHIP - THE FINEST SKILL THERE IS?

Spiritual leadership: the ability to create conditions that are conducive to the development of consciousness in others, using skilful intentions, speech and actions.

Spiritual leadership may be the finest skill there is. Yet it is also one of the most unknown, obscure, & hidden. It’s not widely recognised as a ‘skill’ unto itself, but it surely is, and it is playing an ever more vital role in the development of individuals and society as a whole.

The skills of spiritual leadership are not just for those in designated spiritual roles – they will make you a better parent, partner, friend, neighbour, manager, colleague, and overall contributor to society. It is in truth the only way to help others in a sustainable way – by helping them to help themselves.

Spirituality matters, because all of the challenges we experience as humans – from financial trouble, meaninglessness, anger, sadness and loneliness, to economic meltdown, war and climate change – can all be construed as spiritual challenges. All have their root in the unconscious minds of people. The only lasting solutions will be found in those same minds, by undergoing to make the unconscious conscious – a process Jung coined “individuation” – which is the essence of spiritual growth.

Spiritual leadership involves skilfully guiding others in investigating, becoming aware of and facing up to, internal conflicts that are giving rise to their external challenges.

Historically this role has fallen to religious leaders, who would guide their followers to resolve and grow through all kinds of life challenges, such as those mentioned.

Each lineage of religious leaders would typically develop and refine their methods independently of other lineages, and would only share them with the next generation of leaders, never divulging them to the laypeople. Their workings would be understood and communicated only in terms of symbology pertaining to their religion.

Not only did this obscure the skill from the general population, it limited its effectiveness in line with the limitations of organised religion generally, its identification with symbols and a lack of understanding of the unconscious.

It is precisely this missing piece of the unconscious mind that has made religion pervious to materialist science. Materialism has ultimately led to a decline in religiosity in the West. Less than 50% of US adults now belong to a church, mosque or synagogue, compared with 76% in 1947.

Whilst many of the arguments of material science against religion are valid, it would be rash to presume religions are nothing more than ancient superstitions, existing only for lack of a more precise material model of existence. Religions provide something that material science simply does not. That is, a way to connect with the unconscious, which is vital for any sane human being and functional society. In abandoning religion, we have abandoned so much more than a mere primitive science of reality. We have abandoned connection with parts of ourselves.

In the early 1930s, Carl Jung observed:

“I have treated many hundreds of patients. Among those in the second half of life – that is to say, over 35 – there has not been one whose problem in the last resort was not that of finding a religious outlook on life. It is safe to say that every one of them fell ill because he had lost that which the living religions of every age have given their followers, and none of them has really been healed who did not regain his religious outlook.”

Today we might say their problem in the last resort was ‘spiritual,’ as opposed to ‘religious,’ bearing in mind that Jung said this in the early 1930s, in German. Jung is not making a case for organised religion, but for the importance of cultivating a relationship with the unconscious mind. Indeed a return to organised religion and its absolutism en-masse is not the way forward. Neither is the approach taken by raw materialism that is leading to all kinds of psychological, social and environmental catastrophes. These challenges call upon a third, transcendent approach that integrates both the connection offered by traditional religion with the rationality of modern science. To do so it must incorporate the very understanding of the unconscious mind that religion had missed out.

This re-discovery of the unconscious by psychology over the last 150 years may be looked back on as a pivotal turning point in human history. As much as the unravelling of religion has brought about an agonising disconnection from ourselves, this discovery by return presents a commensurate opportunity for growth – an enhanced understanding of the mind, along with a new emerging role of the spiritual leader.

What an understanding of the unconscious allows us to do is to understand what spiritual growth really means, what it consists of, and what methods we can apply to resolve our most pressing challenges on a personal and societal level.

This opens up the practice of spiritual leadership to everybody, across people of all religions and without religion. Spirituality is universal, and hence the skill of spiritual leadership is universal, but it has remained occult due to the irreconcilable divide between religions and their symbolism, the roles of monastics and laypeople, and the waning popularity of organised religion. Only with an understanding of the unconscious is it possible to bring its techniques out into the open, as a stand-alone skill, that any person can use to improve the lives of those around them, regardless of tradition, faith or lack thereof.

Today there is no shortage of leaders available to help us develop material-based skills and knowledge. Anyone can find leaders online for almost any skill, from stock trading to equestrian tai chi. But proficient spiritual leaders are hard to find. Where are all the true sages? And are these ‘conventional’ leaders genuinely helping us to advance, or just to rearrange the chairs?

Most leaders in the world today – intellectuals, businesspeople, coaches, therapists and religious leaders – behave as though the path to progress is to get everyone else to think and behave like themselves. Whether or not they admit this explicitly. No matter how much conviction one has in their views, this mental stance is antithetical to resolving any of our spiritual challenges. It means neither taking responsibility for the mind, nor practicing wholesome intentions of letting go and compassion, which are the foundation of any spiritual path, as well as of spiritual leadership that facilitates genuine growth in others.

Even those who purport to be teaching spirituality are often behind the scenes avoiding severe conflicts of their own. We can observe these playing out in their interactions in a flagrant way – using their platform not as a way to uncover what is hidden, but as an attempt to perpetually repress unconscious material and regulate unresolved feelings that are blocking their growth. By and large, the understanding of the unconscious, and the unfolding of spiritual growth, is not integrated or practiced by this group either. It too is external-world-wrangling, only disguised in spiritual garb.

Yet we are all spiritual influencers, whether we realise it or not. Our decisions have an influence on the minds of others, the conditions for their growth and the overall direction of society.

Effective spiritual leadership, however, that which leads to genuine growth in others, is contingent on its practitioner’s own attainment of self-knowledge and psychological freedom. Those best suited to lead others in their spiritual growth are those who themselves live by a spiritual practice, and have done considerable psychospiritual work to make the unconscious conscious.

It is these genuine spiritual leaders who are needed to influence the influencers – who take responsibility for their mind, cultivate wholesome intentions and act in a way that is congruent with this mental stance. These are the people best placed to help others to see what they’ve been hiding and make it conscious.

When I think of a ‘sage,’ I think: someone who has done the work on themselves to make the unconscious conscious, and is practicing a complete spiritual way of life that encompasses responsibility, understanding, empathy, conduct and mental discipline.

Most sages are not in designated or official positions of spiritual leadership. They are not necessarily monks, nuns or priests, or even coaches or therapists. They are unusual people, but can nonetheless show up as your dentist, a parent, a teacher or your colleague at work. They do not play status games, measure their self-worth in terms of ‘likes’ or ‘followers,’ nor otherwise push for positions of overt leadership (although they may end up in one). We think of them as spiritual “leaders,” but officially they might show up as peers, clients or subordinates.

Sages are conscious of role and social dynamics, as well as the workings of the conscious and unconscious minds. They are not likely to burst in on a conversation to enforce their opinions, give you “advice” or to “tell you how it is.” Even when they have wisdom that could help, they will not preach or force it on you. Unlike with most conventional leaders, it’s likely that the majority of their leadership performed will not be done overtly, but subtly, without others even knowing what they are doing. In this sense, spiritual leadership is quite different from the ‘leadership’ we ordinarily know and think of.

They operate like a “white hat hacker” for your mind. They excel at sniffing out the bugs that are creating conflict in your mind and life, and offering up the “code” to straighten it out, always with compassion and without judgement.

The number one quality of a sage is that they themselves are a deep practitioner of a spiritual way of life. It is by virtue of their own realisation that they make for proficient spiritual leaders. They are not clouded by their own unresolved shadow material, nor any compulsion for you to be or behave a certain way, but accept you as you are. Only when you are at peace with yourself are you truly capable of helping the world.

One such method for spiritual realisation is The Seven Habits of Individuation. These are my best attempt to deconstruct and systemise the wisdom of sages – people I have known, and from throughout history, across spiritual traditions. The Habits convey not only what works for spiritual growth, but why it works, taking on board the understanding of the unconscious mind. This allows anybody to apply the principles of coming to consciousness, and walk the path of the sage, regardless of faith, tradition or lack thereof.

Beyond personal practice, the secondary qualities of a sage are that they are both knowledgeable educators and skilled coaches. Like all teachers, they have a reliable model and an expansive system of knowledge which they can call upon. But in terms of their interactions, they perform more like a coach, working with each unique person as they are and engaging in explorative dialogue. These parallel skills of educating and coaching develop naturally by virtue of doing the work on their own mind.

Most of those we consider conventional ‘leaders’ – our bosses, managers, people in positions of power – are at most only practicing four or five of the total Seven Habits consistently, if any. So we should not expect this group to offer much by way of useful guidance around the lasting spiritual solutions that we so desperately need. Even what passes for ‘spiritual leaders’ in our modern age are often only practicing 5 or 6 of the Habits consistently. They might, for example, omit to do any kind of regular, dedicated mental practice such as meditation, allowing their mind to become slack and reactive. Or they might communicate in a way that suggests skittishness, pushiness or passive aggression. They might be open to discussing and facing their feelings, but not to taking responsibility for them, believing instead that it’s the world that needs to change in order for their feelings to to be resolved. They repeatedly think one thing but say another, say one thing but do another, and struggle to execute on what they consciously set out to do.

Practice of the Seven Habits is synergistic. The difference between practicing any six, vs. all seven, is huge in terms of the results to your mind, and your ability to lead others in genuine spiritual growth.

A sage will be practicing all Seven Habits. It is wise to learn how to spot one. Not all coaches, therapists and those in positions of spiritual leadership are sages. We in the West have become so disconnected from spiritual leadership, spiritual practice and what they involve, that proficient spiritual leaders are more the exception than the rule even in spiritual and self-help circles.

In fact, the label of coach, therapist or spiritual leader can provide an effective camouflage for those whose real intentions are not to help, but to manipulate – motivated not by the will to meaning, but by the compulsion to find relief from unresolved feelings of their own through the will to power.

No person is perfect or without an unconscious, including sages, but there is a qualitative difference between the sage and the power-hungry manipulator. Namely, whether they are honestly taking responsibility for their mind and cultivating wholesome intentions. Or, whether they are merely acting out these qualities in a way that is just about convincing enough to anyone with a yearning to believe. Often they do not even try to appear compassionate, but circle like ravenous wolves waiting to pounce at the first whiff of vulnerability, with nothing but the lauded arrogance of the Western cultural persona for cover. In any case, their true intentions are hidden in plain sight, if only we allow ourselves to see past what we want to see. It is actually impossible to be fooled if no part of you is at least a little bit complicit in the fooling.

These two practices of responsibility and intention are fundamental to genuine spiritual growth, despite being generally disregarded by Western self-help modalities. That is why they are Habits 1 & 2 of the Seven Habits of Individuation.

It is important to be cautious and choose spiritual leaders carefully. But at the same time not to be deterred from opening up and sharing vulnerability at the right time. It is vital that you are able to share, under the right circumstances and with someone who is themselves walking the path of the sage.

Becoming more conscious is essential in being able to help others do the same. Only consciousness can bring out the unconscious. Otherwise all that can occur is the unconscious reacting to the unconscious, and the projection of shadow material. The full set of differences between the sage and the manipulator are captured by the Seven Habits of Individuation.

The world needs spiritual leaders. It needs leaders who have done the work on themselves to make the unconscious conscious. We are met with “an enormous spiritual task” which, according to Jung, “must be accomplished if we wish to preserve our civilisation.” It needs leaders who are willing to get to work on the heart of the matter – the mind itself – by taking responsibility for their own mind, cultivating wholesome intentions of letting go and compassion, and conducting themselves in a way that reflects this understanding. It needs leaders who know that external benefits will come as a result of their work on themselves, and guiding others to do the same.

If you are interested to learn more about spiritual leadership, to help improve your life and your impact, whatever your role, here are some further actions you can take:

• Download my handbook The Way of Individuation: Seven Habits for Spiritual Development
• Read the Blog
• Book a free 30 minute Perspectives Call